So, it has been a very long while since I, or any of us, have written on Kleronomo and for those of you who have stuck around: welcome back to another post 🙂 ! And for those of you who don’t know about Kleronomo: welcome! On behalf of all of us, I can safely say that life has just been one heck of a ride so far. So here’s a little catch-up on what’s been going on in our lives since the last time we wrote:
- We graduated from high school 🙂
- We all attend different colleges across California
- We have been growing in different ways because of this transition
- We are still learning about God’s grace & the importance of pursuing Him in college
Because of this crazy transition from high school to college, I personally didn’t even think to write on here and I never thought I would for a long time. But, throughout this transition, I realize that God is both crazy (in a good way, of course) and creative in how He carries out His plans. So, as I take this time to devote this time to God by writing this post, I want to write about the importance of the unknown and how it has played a crucial part in my transition from a high school student to a college student below.
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“The Lord directs our steps, so why try to understand everything along the way?” ~Proverbs 20:24 (NLT)
How in the world can chaos be peaceful? The word “chaos” implies something is not orderly or not organized in an orderly fashion. It looks like the aftermath of a tornado or the aftermath of trying to cram in just 300 more years of history for the midterm you clearly procrastinated for. Either way, chaos does NOT imply peace. It does not imply that everything will be okay. It does not imply that you are going to ace the midterm and get enough sleep. So, how can chaos be peaceful?
Jesus.
Let’s go back to my senior year self. Noreen, a socially awkward introvert who knew a lot of people at her small high school, but was never one of the popular people. She struggled a lot with her self-confidence, but thankfully had supportive friends who did life with her and impacted her life in so many different ways. College application time was the most popular topic of discussion that almost every senior in her high school was stressing out about. The thought of college was too far way at the time and she was stressing out too because she had no clue where she wanted to go.
Friend A: “I applied to 9 different schools. What about you?”
Friend B:”I applied to 17 different colleges. What about you?”
Friend C: “I applied to so many different universities that I don’t even know how many applications I’ve done. What about you?”
Noreen: “I only applied to 5 universities.”
Apparently 5 was a low number. Apparently 5 was a shocking number. And the 5 she picked ranged everywhere from private Christian universities to top-tier universities. She literally had to give herself a range because she knew she was indecisive about everything. So when March came around, she never expected that God would give her the hardest question she had to answer at the time:
“Are you going to go where you want to go, a place of comfort and security studying My Word, or are you going to go where I am calling you to go, a place without comfort or security and where my Name is rejected and shunned?”
After several weeks of prayer and hard decision-making, she ended up going to the place where He was calling her to go. And because she decided to take this leap of faith, she had absolutely no idea what was going to be in store for her. When she confirmed her spot as a student at the university, the following night, she and her dad were watching the news and there was a news report about a massive breakout at the university. Her future university. After the news report finished, she and her dad had a moment of silence. Was there chaos? Yes. Was there tension? Yes. Was there fear? Yes. Was there faith? Yes.
This university is nothing like my small Christian high school. But, this university has allowed me to grow deeper in my relationship with God thanks to the people in my Christian fellowship. Honestly, without them, I could see myself falling away from my faith in God and I’m so thankful that God has put them in my life. The lack of security, the lack of comfort, the lack of safety, and the lack of peace that I have experienced have molded my faith in God in a much deeper and stronger way. In short, my freshman year of college has so far been one of the most chaotic years of my life. But, with Jesus, it has also been one of the most peaceful years of my life, despite the chaos. I would have never grown so much in my faith had I not decided to go here and say, “Okay God, even though I am scared as ever to make this decision, even though I have absolutely no idea what you are doing, and even though I don’t understand why you are calling me here, I know that you will provide for me. I trust you.”
The unknown is a scary place. For me, I want to know the schedule/ itinerary when I’m going on a road trip. I want to know that I am going to be happy by the end of a certain situation. I WANT TO KNOW WHAT’S GOING ON AT ALL TIMES (you can kind of tell already that I’m not one for scary surprises aka I absolutely hate anything that has to do with jump scares and/ or horror- related things 🙂 ). And sometimes, there are moments where God will not tell you what your next step is going to be. And that can be absolutely frustrating. But, it is in these moments where you have to realize that God ultimately knows what our next steps are going to be and because He knows, you have to trust Him, even if it takes risking everything for Him. And hey, in the end, choosing to trust Him might just be the best decision you have ever made (at least for me it was 🙂 ).
If you’re in a time of chaos right now, know that God invites us to come to Him and find rest and peace in Him (Matthew 11:28), because He is the peace that lies within the chaos and outside of the chaos. When we see chaos, He sees an opportunity. And it is through the chaos that we ultimately learn more about ourselves and even more about the God who created us. As we trudge through our chaotic storms, God extends His hand out to us, offering to walk with us through our storms and ultimately lead us out of them, since He knows the way out. All we have to do is take His hand and trust in Him.
Kleronomo 